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By Laura Stec

Naked Men and Pineapple with Tomato

Uploaded: Aug 21, 2016

So I just arrive at the Pioneer last Sunday, and while waiting for my Vodka Soda Tall with Lime, had a conversation with a guy I know that was a longer version of this:

HE: You look like you just got out of the pool.

ME: I did.

HE: Your hair is kinda messy.

ME: I just got out of the pool.

HE: You know, you are a public figure [you shouldn’t go out looking like that.

ME: Huh?

HE: And you don’t have on any makeup.

It was just chitty-chat in the beginning, until it went on for a few minutes and I checked in with myself.

ME: Alright already, enough about how I look, let’s start talking about how you look.

I'm fascinated how normal our conversation seemed at first, until I realized I would never start a casual conversation with a guy about the way he looked, as if we were reviewing an object or a dinner plate presentation.

Later this week the statue of naked Donald came out. I laughed until I thought, would I be laughing if someone erected a naked Hillary? Why was it ok for me to laugh at a naked man statue, but be offended by the thought of a naked woman statue?

All kinds of social norms collided this week. My Deadhead client Jerry wanted Mango Mint Crab Spring Rolls with Grilled Pineapple Peach Salsa for his birthday party. Even though I proposed to him, when the time came, I got cold feet. Combining pineapple with tomato, hmmm, in this intimate of a relationship, just seemed too acidic, too yin and yin but strange bedfellow.

But in the end, it worked really well.

"So refreshing," they said.

I guess it's good sometimes to question the norms.

Mango Mint Crab Spring Rolls with Grilled Pineapple Peach Salsa
Makes 4 rolls

6 oz fresh crab
1 mango, peeled and julienned (make it a thick julienne)
2 tablespoons finely chopped mint
1 tablespoon fresh lime juice
Salt, and freshly ground white pepper
Rice paper
Green onions, sliced into thin strips

Break up the crab and check it for bones. Combine with mango, mint, juice, salt and pepper.

Soak a rice paper in lukewarm water until pliable. Transfer to a clean cloth to absorb extra water, then immediately transfer to a cutting board. Add 2 tablespoons filling, and roll into a “burrito.” The trick is to tug on the paper slightly while rolling, in order to make it tight. Halfway through, tuck in the sides and finish rolling. Place on a clean baking sheet or plate, and finish the rest of the rolls. Cover tightly with plastic wrap and store till Appy Hour.

Slice rolls gently with bread knife, being careful not to tear the paper. Tie with a green onion strip. If the strips are not pliable enough to tie around the roll, blanch quickly in boiling water, then transfer to an ice bath to cool.

Top with microgreens. Serve with a side of salsa.

Grilled Pineapple Peach Salsa
Makes 3 cups

1/2 cup seeded, firm tomato, diced small (must be in season)
1 1/2 cups grilled pineapple, diced small
½ cup pealed peach, diced small
¼ cup chopped green onion
1 serrano chili, diced small
splash champagne vinegar, honey and lime juice
¼ cup chopped cilantro
Cumin and cayenne to taste
Salt and freshly ground white pepper

Mix together and season to taste.

Pioneer Blues Jam
Sundays, 4 PM – 8 PM
2925 Woodside Rd, Woodside, CA

Fantastic blues, top-notch musicians, great dancing, super friendly folks, no cover (but tip the musicians please).