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Player, coach in bullying spat

Original post made on Feb 18, 2011

The parents of a Mountain View High School varsity basketball player are putting a full-court press on their daughter's coach, alleging that the woman has bullied their teenager for years, an accusation the coach denies.




Read the full story here Web Link posted Friday, February 18, 2011, 11:06 AM

Comments (91)

Posted by Der KK, a resident of another community
on Feb 18, 2011 at 2:02 pm

I'm certainly not going to say I'm in the know about this situation as closely as the players, coaches or the students. However the coaches denial of using the "b-word" stating she actually said "witch" is dubious at best.

Honestly, when's the last time you used the word "witch" in a heated exchange? How could that word have been used at halftime?

- "Sharissa, stop acting like a witch!"
- "Sharissa, you're a witch you know that. You know, because you've casted a spell of turnoveritis on this entire team."
- "Witch please! You've been letting #14 go to the hole all night!"
- "Asst. Coach Johnson, I just wish this witch would just back up off me!"

I'm sorry, but I just don't buy Judy's side of the story.


Posted by @Der KK, a resident of Castro City
on Feb 18, 2011 at 2:28 pm

OK, I hear you.

But, how many times do you hear a High School Coach call a child a B*#&$. I think that is dubious as well.

This family seems a bit over the top. They say,
"I believe there has never been a player of this caliber at this school. Yet, Judy has not lifted a finger to help her get recruited."

OF COURSE! Your daughter is the best there ever was. If it is true, she needs to be on a travel team so scouts can see her. The Coach is not the one to get her recruited. SHE NEEDS TO BE ON A TRAVEL TEAM. The recruiters no longer attend high school games.


Posted by scaredtospeakout, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 18, 2011 at 2:30 pm

My question is to Mr. Navarro. What games have you attended to possibly witness what is going on with this team? I have never seen you there.


Posted by Leia, a resident of The Crossings
on Feb 18, 2011 at 2:30 pm

I wonder what the other players say in private. Naturally, we can't possibly, but they would know.

I am sure that MVHS is doing their best to investigate.


Posted by Jim Doughty, a resident of Gemello
on Feb 18, 2011 at 2:34 pm

Seems to me that some electronic apparatus could gather necessary evidence in short order....

Cheers


Posted by scaredtospeakout, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 18, 2011 at 2:35 pm

DER KK

She is on a travel team. High School coaches can help and your wrong, College Coaches can attend HS games. This kid happens to be a very good player at MVHS and we were lucky to have her.


Posted by Andrea Gemmet, Mountain View Voice Editor
on Feb 18, 2011 at 3:15 pm

Andrea Gemmet is a registered user.

The following two comments were moved from a duplicate thread, which has now been closed:

Not sure of all the facts, but it sounds suspicious to me. Why would a student's family randomly have it out for a coach? I've seen MV b-ball games before, and this girl is definitely one of the best players in the Bay Area.
by George Meters Feb 18, 2011 at 10:41 am

Auclair called the 17-year-old "a disrespectful b-word." or witch. The coach should be reprimanded for that alone, and then everyone should move on.
by observer Feb 18, 2011 at 11:57 am


Posted by scaredtospeakout, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 18, 2011 at 4:13 pm

The disrespectful "B" word was heard by other people and had to be addressed. Situations and comments have been going on for a long time. Head Coach not the only one at fault here. Maturity of this coaching staff is very much in question. You would have had to been there this season to fully understand the situation.


Posted by noneofyourbusiness, a resident of Jackson Park
on Feb 18, 2011 at 4:56 pm

Maybe the girl needs to transfer to another school. If she's that good, she would have got a scholarship to a high school that would love to have her. So I think the parents are definetely at fault here and need to do their OWN work getting her recruited. It's no ones job but the parents when it comes down to it.


Posted by MVHS Alum, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 18, 2011 at 5:47 pm

Dan Navarro supports this kind of behavior. He was nothing short of a bully his ENTIRE carrer. Treated every player like dirt. Never once in his life did he write a letter for any of his players to ANY college PERIOD...he used his players and threw them away like trash. Why would ANY program keep a losing coach for 30 plus years ?? He should have been fired in the 80's. A lot of coaches around the bay area cannot stand him. He is not respected at all !! He made sure any player that had bad grades was "passed" just to benifit himself. In turn hurting those kids education. Dan thank the lord your rein at MVHS is finally OVER !!!


Posted by parent, a resident of Castro City
on Feb 18, 2011 at 7:24 pm

Sharissa's family is a well respected family from old mountain view "the Olmos'" a very competitive family anyone from the "old days" can tell you every member of this family played every sport.
This young lady is a senior her last year why would you the Olmos's do this to her. but her on blast!! regardless of what the teacher said what her family is doing is wrong. As I recall her uncle was principal at Mountain View years ago. If Sharissa is good let her grow from this experience. You may a get what you want but is this the way to go. Can you really feel good about all this drama??


Posted by ILuvHangerOne, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 18, 2011 at 10:45 pm

Being a good player is no longer enough to be recruited. An athlete has to be proactive in their own campaign, has to be academically sound, a team player, have great work ethic and be coachable. Some of those things could be debated.

Said player has yelled at the coach on several occasions during games and still got to play, A LOT. That is unheard of in most places. And if I was coaching a team, would not allow a player to even be on my team with that kind of behavior, never mind play (even if they were the best darn player in the nation).

That being said, if the coach said those things, witch or the b word to any player, it was out of line and wrong. Being fired for something like that is a bit extreme. Some teachers, kids, and parents swear and say inappropriate things all the time, whether they should or not and they are not fired, expelled, or deemed child abusers. They need to be addressed, corrected and move on from the situation.

In the end, high school sports are just preparation for life. Sometimes there are obstacles and drama. It is how we deal and overcome the obstacles and drama that define us.


Posted by MV ALUM 05, a resident of Waverly Park
on Feb 19, 2011 at 10:53 am

From my experience, MVHS has a history of bad coaches in basketball and baseball. A lot of turnover. However, way too much parent involvement that I am sure frustrates coaches. A good coach will create an environment where players become better individuals. I rarely saw this happen at MVHS except in football.


Posted by Thom, a resident of Jackson Park
on Feb 19, 2011 at 11:39 pm

A coach should never lose it like this. Doesn't matter what the player had done or said. If a player is really a distraction then it is the coach's decision to cut him or her or keep him or her around. There are too many qualified people in coaching to allow this to pass without addressing it. I also think it's time to get a third party to investigate the allegations.


Posted by alum, a resident of Cuesta Park
on Feb 20, 2011 at 11:54 am

seems like parents who are overprotective. seriously....who can say they have played any sport and not had a coach get frustrated or swear. you are not in elementary school anymore.

what does she expect? say she gets recruited and goes on to play college ball. if your coach calls you a bitch are you going to try to get her fired to?


Posted by AnnoyedPlayer, a resident of another community
on Feb 20, 2011 at 9:23 pm

Honestly I am very annoyed at this whole situation.

Judy is a great coach to all her players, yes sometimes she may yell at us or get frustrated during the games, but I don't believe she is a bully. Any coach can get mad and out of control. Has anyone seen Wilcox's Girls Varsity coach?

And yes I agree that Sharissa is a great player. One of the best of the team, but she also has a bad attitude lots of the time. She talks back and is very disrespectful a lot of the times. And she isn't always a team player. Not only that, but we all know that her parents, especially her dad put a lot of pressure on her to be the best. Maybe that is why this season she hasn't had such a great season. You can't blame our coach for everything.

Maybe a lot of you see what goes on during the games, but are you really there during the practices. Where we spend all our time with Judy. And I'm not talking about the practices that Sharissa's family went and watch after all of this began.

I'm sure I speak for lots of our team members, that we think this has been blowned way out of porportion. Sharissa is leaving next year, there is no need for all the unecessary drama. On the other hand us players who aren't seniors still have lots of time left to play basketball with Judy and we love her. We wouldn't be happy with any other coach. Why should we have to pay for this family's huge fit.

I've seen and heard how the family talks about Judy, before this whole drama began. It's not pretty and they can't deny.

Honestly I just think that it's not about whats right and wrong anymore. I think this family just wants to screw Judy over.

It needs to stop. They aren't thinking about the whole team and you can tell, because the only person the mention is Sharissa nothing about what' is good for the team. Get over it! She will never have to see Judy again so leave her and our team alone.


Posted by toscaredtospeak, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 21, 2011 at 1:11 pm

Annoyedplayer did you play on the Varsity team this season?


Posted by b-ball fan, a resident of another community
on Feb 21, 2011 at 2:24 pm

@alum;
college is for adults over 18. what ever happens among players and coaches is a big difference at that level. what happened at Mt.View high school was between adult and minor.


Posted by Sal, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 21, 2011 at 4:44 pm

The coach isn't being honest about the "Witch" comment. Bad character.

She should be fired for that statement alone.


Posted by sheesh, a resident of Blossom Valley
on Feb 21, 2011 at 10:25 pm

What absurdity. Respect is a two-way street... the coach should not have lashed out at the player, but when a player disrespects the coach, the player sits. period. From personal experience in a different sport, I've seen that tactic do wonders for players of all abilities, from role players to olympians. When a player loses respect for a coach, that player loses playing time. And if the parents observed their child being disrespectful to a coach, they should have acted... players do not learn to disrespect their coach at the varsity level... they see it growing up with their parents berating a coaches decision and undermining their authority at the dinner table. I would not have ever considered yapping at any of my coaches during the game... wanna talk about playing time or game time decisions in private? great... shows the courage and passion coaches like to see in a player. but shut your trap during the game... players and parents.


Posted by response to the posts, a resident of Shoreline West
on Feb 22, 2011 at 1:36 am

so all younger players or people that are a year ahead and go to play in college when they are still 17 should be treated differently...until they turn 18?

come on - she is in high school....she can handle it like an adult and not make a big scene about it and get the parents involved. one thing would be if she was in middle school or elementary school but a senior in high school....are her parents moving to the same city she decides to go to college to?



Posted by toscaredtospeak, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 22, 2011 at 5:03 pm

As I read through all this I have to sigh. We have people accusing the parents of being "too protective", we have people saying "Move on", "get over it". We have someone claiming to be a player on this team saying "I'm tired of the drama". We actually have someone insinuating that when someone turns 18 and goes to college well then "name calling" would be acceptable and because someone is a "Coach" we find a way to make it OK. How sad is that. Who gets to decide when a parent is "too protective". Whether my kid is 17 or 33 I would laugh at someone for saying that to me. I will stand by my children forver if they need me to in a situation no matter how old they are. I raise my children not to call people names and to never stand for someone calling them names. Just because someone has the title of being called a "coach", self control is still part of the job. The main problem is everyone is focused on this one incident. The coaches reputation and the players reputation are both under fire here. If in fact the player has been that disrespectful for as long as people claim, well then just one more reason to fire the coach for allowing it and exposing those other kids to it for that long. Now I have to ask myself this question, was this about winning games or being a mentor?


Posted by ILuvHangerOne, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 22, 2011 at 7:12 pm

This has been an interesting discussion to follow.

But to add more to the discussion.

Coaches and players in both instances are human. No one is perfect and people make mistakes. They both have feelings and emotions. Sometimes emotions in sport can escalate. In instances where either one has gone over the line, it has to be recognized and an apology after is the appropriate action.

This entire article is a bit convoluted because it is all over the place on the real issue at heart.

What is the issue? Is the coach a bully? Name caller? Abusive? Unhelpful? Bad person? Bad comedienne? Bad coach? A bad judge of character?

It lists a bunch of issues from one family. No other family or player was quoted or made a statement.

I have seen high school coaches demean groups of players and throw things toward them and that wasn't grounds for firing.

A lot of folks are quick to fire the coach for subjective interpretation. Instead, why not have an open dialog with coach, players, parents, and administration? Win-Wins and mediation and finding common ground are always a great option for peace. Isn't that a better call to action, than being trigger happy to terminate someone right off the bat?

If anything, maybe we shouldn't just look at this one coach and one player, but maybe we need to look at the entire culture of high school sports and demand that our schools have a matrix for having and retaining coaches. But also it is the responsibility of the families to let the coaches coach to the best of their abilities and the players play to the best of theirs.

It is an entire culture that needs to be re-vamped. Parents, players and coaches have to respect one another and have an open line of communication.


Posted by toscaredtospeak, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 22, 2011 at 7:34 pm

GREAT POST!!!! Get to the bottom of it!


Posted by Julie, a resident of Cuesta Park
on Feb 23, 2011 at 9:07 am

It would have been so much better if all directly involved (parents, player and coach)had just sat down together with a neutral observer and discussed it all out. At present you have an emotional mess that has affected more people than it needed to.


Posted by reader, a resident of another community
on Feb 23, 2011 at 2:42 pm

toscaredtospeak obviously has never played sports - what coach in a competitive setting has ever kept their cool?


Posted by anotherreader, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 23, 2011 at 4:33 pm

talking about bullying - tooscaredtospeak .... you automatically discrediting a high school student who plays on the team and is a MINOR, makes you a bully!!!

i think out of anyone on this thread that has the most credibility to comment on this subject matter is the student who is a member of the team and has seen this first hand!

i on the other hand will not comment further!


Posted by toscaredtospeak, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 23, 2011 at 5:57 pm

Really anotherreader???? I happen to be pretty positive that not 1 girl on this Varsity team would have written that. We will get through CCS and then I think you just woke a sleeping giant!!! And "reader" not only have I played competitively I have played at a division 1 level. I have had enough. Too bad no one chose to have any integrity in this situation. Definitly would have had a different outcome. Good Luck to all.


Posted by reader, a resident of another community
on Feb 23, 2011 at 6:09 pm

so you are saying in all your times playing competitive sports you never ONCE heard a coach swear? how are you sure not one girl on the varsity team wrote that - are you at practice everyday?

with every post you are losing credibility....


Posted by toscaredtospeak, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 23, 2011 at 6:33 pm

Reader. Didn't say I was sure, said I was "pretty positive" Coaches swear all the time. Still doesn't make it right and there is a difference in swearing and swearing at some one directly. Losing my credibility?????? we will see.


Posted by mvvoicereader, a resident of Blossom Valley
on Feb 24, 2011 at 9:13 am

aren't "sure" and "pretty positive" synonyms?

and swearing at the team or at someone directly seems like it is a part of sports. if she can't tolerate it then maybe she shouldn't be playing sports....especially if she cant handle it one on one and has to bring her parents, administration and the media into the mix.

....my 2 cents


Posted by mvvoicereader, a resident of Blossom Valley
on Feb 24, 2011 at 9:13 am

aren't "sure" and "pretty positive" synonyms?

and swearing at the team or at someone directly seems like it is a part of sports. if she can't tolerate it then maybe she shouldn't be playing sports....especially if she cant handle it one on one and has to bring her parents, administration and the media into the mix.

....my 2 cents


Posted by 06Alum, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 24, 2011 at 1:13 pm

I just thought I might give my perspective since I was on the team all four years. My last two years were with Judy as our coach. She was new to us coming off of a coach that was let go because he was said to be too hard on us players. (After one player complained to her mom) A decision I was disappointed in because he was the perfect coach for me because I needed to be pushed and I was the best I've ever been with him as my coach.

So seeing this situation is a bit of a de-ja-vu. Not to say what Judy said was okay, but I am tired of athletes who think they can disrespect authority figures and then bring an army of parents and administration when the coach reacts. I was a team caption my senior year along with some other seniors. We had a few that had attitude problems like any team. Judy never attacked them or bullied them by any means. When they talked back or were disrespectful, she would have them focus on the drill at hand. Our team needed to support each-other as well. Especially come game time, I was usually the one to calm the hot-heads and get them to use their emotion in the next play of game. Maybe that's what the current team needs to do. Don't look at Sharissa as a problem that is never going to get better with the coach. Rally around her as a team and focus the dramatic energy to the game.

What happened was wrong, but it doesn't have to end with termination, or transfer of teams.


Posted by Anonymous, a resident of North Whisman
on Feb 24, 2011 at 2:26 pm

I never post any comments, but I feel obloged to post one on here...

Judy was one of my very first coaches for both softball and basketball and she was a great coach. I was maybe only 9 when I first started and I don't remember anything negative about my years being coached by her. She is a great coach and I'm sure all of my teammates can attest to that.

So maybe she called the player a "witch." Everybody slips up every once in awhile-no one is perfect. When you're in a competitive league, it's inevitable to get frustrated. When you're being yelled at by your own player, I'm sure that is just as frustarting. Getting fired, in my opinion is an extreme.

And the player-what does she think is going to happen if she ends up playing ball for a nationally ranked school (since apparently she is that good)?

I mean, there is even a post on here from one of Judy's current players-the first inside source other than the Sharissa herself.

I agree with ILuvHangerOne... have an open discussion with players, coaches, families, administration, etc to get down to the core and then move on. All coaches yell. All coaches get frustrated.

From personal experience, Judy is a great coach and I believe this has been blown way out of proportion. If her own player is asking every one to stop, then maybe we should give it a rest and leave them alone.


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 25, 2011 at 11:20 am

ZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZ....Oh sorry,I fell asleep trying read those last two posts from the players that had Judy as a coach back in the day. Bottom line to everyone posting on this feed...YOU CANNOT LOSE 9 GAMES! They have some of the best talent this school has seen in a long time. Too many head games, and too much favoritism cost these kids a season that they will never get back.


Posted by imgoingtogetcrapforthis, a resident of another community
on Feb 25, 2011 at 12:58 pm

....ok, but come on.....this is women's basketball?!


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 25, 2011 at 1:08 pm

Haha be careful over there!


Posted by kim, a resident of North Whisman
on Feb 25, 2011 at 7:49 pm

lolz


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Cuesta Park
on Feb 25, 2011 at 10:41 pm

@ The situation---oh please. They had the same amount of talent on the team last season and they were 9-3-0. It couldn't have been the additions to the team and the new dynamic....

With the bickering and drama at a simmer it seems the girls are playing like they should have been all season.

There is favoritism on school teams. That's life. Get over it. If you don't like it, don't have your kid participate in a varsity sport (the coach isn't required to play your kid, even if they are on the team). It is the coach's job to get them to CCS with the team they feel will get them there. And let's look at the facts, even though they went 3-9-0 (opposite of last year's record 9-3-0 according to MaxPreps); they won their second round CCS playoff game.

It is easy for people in the stands to make judgments on how a coach coaches without being in the ring of fire (and coaching your kids from the stands during the game doesn't count).

If this coach is such a bully or plays head games, why is anyone even still playing for her? Shouldn't the parents teach their children to walk away from an abusive/bad situation? Way to teach your kids to stay in an abusive situation (if it truly is). No it is basketball, so it is way more important to play a sport in high school and tolerating abuse than walking away. That is a life lesson everyone should take note of.

This is an obvious power play. Who has more power and who is going to win? That works until you get what you ask for and then you end up with something worse than before.

Be careful for what you wish for,you just may get it.

Players and coaches of MVHS, good luck on your CCS game! Play hard and do your best!


Posted by truth-hurts, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 26, 2011 at 12:57 am

It's sad when I read stories like this. A coach is being attacked and attempts are made to take her job because some self righteous player got their feelings hurt? Yes, coaches are held to a higher standard than most. However, coaches are also human and subject to error. Does this mean they should lose their livlihood? How about the next time I order a steak dinner and it arrive burnt the chef be fired. Or the next time I go to the store and am given incorrect change, that person is fired.

Isn't the purpose of high school to prepare our youth both academically and emotionally for the real world? As it stands, a disgusting majority of our youth are not in fact prepared for the real world as they've been pampered and taught that when they whine and don't get their way, people get fired.

I'm seeing one player with a personal grudge against an otherwise more than qualified coach. Odd how the only ones protesting happen to be friends and relative of one single player. They pushed a prior issue regarding an email photo of a shirtless man as pornography? Seriously? When that didn't work, they took it to the authorities outside the school who again denied them since obviously justice wasn't due and their accusations were trumped up and unfounded. By the way, shirtless men appear on public television, so don't give me that line of crap. As if the little angels in their perfect little bubbles at school haven't been exposed to far worse in the majority.

Sounds like some angry parents need to get a grip on reality. Since when is it the coach's job to secure your kid's future? Pathetic. No scouts have seen your kid play. I suppose "scout" isn't obvious enough of a title, these talent agents just sit at their desks playing solitaire, waiting for talent to walk into their office right? No. As the title would imply, they hunt for talent. It's their job and obviously they're good at what they do. Maybe the talent scouts haven't bothered with this player because they just weren't worth their time. Trust me, if this player was in fact THAT good, talent scouts would already know who they were.

It's time for poeple to quit expecting silver spoons to be jammed in their faces and learn to earn things in life such as status and respect. Maybe the coach shouldn't have used such harsh language with the little darling, but my question is, what did the player do to deserve it? Outbursts like this don't happen at random and since it seems to be a rather isolate incident it looks pretty suspicious on the part of the player and their family mob.

Time to buck up people, this isn't disneyland it's the real world. Think high school is tough? Wait until real life smacks kids in the face in today's world. Personally I applaud the coach. I wish we had more coaches and teachers like this who aren't subject to injustices of parents with an axe to grind and call b.s. when they see it.

To the parents of the whiney player causing trouble, look on the bright side. If your allstar isn't cut out for basketball, I hear McDonald's is hiring.


Posted by MVHSparentandothers, a resident of another community
on Feb 26, 2011 at 6:28 pm

This situation clearly is about a lot more than a coach losing her temper and swearing at a player. That altercation was an outcome of a lot more. I hope that the administration will recognize that. The issues that need to be considered are...

1. Clearly, the "bad rapport" between the coach and player is a long term one. This should never have been allowed. Undeniably, a poor coaching decision.

2. For those that say the player/parents are being vindictive... you should KNOW that the coach is as guilty of this as the player/parent may be. This has become a war and it takes two to create that situation. Demonstrates a lack of maturity on the part of the coach as well.

3. Simply because this is the only player that has spoken out about this situations does not mean others don't feel the same way. I KNOW that there are other players and parents on the team (and not just one other) that are afraid to speak out in fear of retribution from the coach. It is interesting that only PAST players have spoken in support of the coach, but not current players.

4. When there is an altercation between a player and coach, the administration should ALWAYS expect the coach (adult, role model and person in authority) to behave in the more mature manner. This was clearly not the case here.

5. Having favorites happens... agreed. However, a significant role of the coach is to inspire and motivate the players. This coach verbally tells her team that Player A and Player B are my favorites, makes unnecessary digs at the players and shows poor judgment in her interactions with the players. Absolutely unacceptable and counter-productive to creating cohesiveness and motivating her players to be their very best. Very likely a contributing factor to the dismal league record for this talent group of ladies. The coach has to be held accountable for this.

It would be a shame for the administration to "investigate" this situation alone and not examine the whole of the parts.

Best of luck to this amazing group of girls in CCS!

(sorry for the long post)


Posted by toscaredtospeak, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 26, 2011 at 7:34 pm

The sleeping GIANT has awoken!!

To all of you who think you are helping this coach out that haven't been in the situation, you are sadly mistaken.

Best thing for this coach is everyone ssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Not toscaredtospeak anymore!


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 26, 2011 at 8:02 pm

To StopThe MonkeyBusiness: I will respond to each paragraph you wrote individually.
Paragraph 1: Read that back to yourself over and over. If they had the same amount of talent last season they shouldn't have lost nine games…I will give you a chance to rethink that one…your welcome.
Paragraph 2: They have been playing better, I agree. DO you think it might be because all of the "bickering" caused her to change her style?
Paragraph 3: The coach is not required to play your kid but if you think about it….the child in question gets an awful lot of playing time…along with mine…trust me, I am just as competitive as you. Don't play the CCS card in this situation. It doesn't work. We got lucky and you know it!
Paragraph 4: I have been in the ring of fire…from league championships all the way to state titles. I know a good coach when I see one.
Paragraph 5: Where else would you like them to play? This is the only place these kids get to play high school ball. Do you want us to maybe use an address that isn't ours so we can play at a different school? That would be lying. And it is probably a bad choice to bring that up right now.
Paragraph 6: We will win. And nothing could be worse…
Paragraph 7: That's why I'm wishing for it!
Paragraph 8: Do you think that saying good luck to them makes you a nice person? lol


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 26, 2011 at 8:40 pm

To truth-hurts: I will respond to each paragraph individually

Paragraph 1: Your first 2 sentences killed you…...for one, no one really cares if you were sad while you read this…and second…you resorted to calling a child a name…so ummm, you already lost. I happen to know that if someone was relying on being a high school coach for money, they are in the wrong profession. She has a whole team of coaches that need to get paid…so im sure its not about the money…
If that chef continues to burn everyones steak and they complain, chances are he will be fired…I am struggling to see where a chef burning a steak is relevant to this topic…same goes for the store clerk…still struggling to see the relevance…haha

Paragraph 2: The purpose of high school is to educate…that's why they call it school. A disgusting amount of people judge other parents on their parenting styles. No one ever knows if they are doing it right, and whos to say they are wrong? You?

Paragraph 3: They only people that don't have a problem with this coach are the 7 other seniors that want nothing to do with this. A shirtless email to a group of girls from a coach is inappropriate.

Paragraph 4: Maybe you should hold a seminar for MV parents on parenting since your so qualified. We are not asking this coach to secure anything…I have no idea where that came from? Are you a "scout"? Why do you think it is ok to talk about this kid like this? Why should I trust you? You bash on kids….while not using your real name…

Paragraph 5: Do you expect respect after writing this post..darling? hehe
It doesn't matter what the child did, it is about how the ADULT handled it. Mob? Really....

Paragraph 6: I'm really sorry that life has obviously been so tough on you and you didn't get the family support you needed. I'm here for you if you need me.

Paragraph 7: Uh oh, you called her another name…and honestly? Do you feel big and bad now? Wanted to go out with a real bang huh? I have more respect for people that work at McDonalds then I do for people that judge other parents and call teenage girls names.

With love,
TheSituation


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Cuesta Park
on Feb 27, 2011 at 12:05 am

The Situation:
I will go through yours one paragraph at a time.

1.Yes they had the same amount of talent and they should have done better this year. But let's face it when parents and their child feel they should be playing above others, the animosity that presents itself doesn't help the team environment. It needed to be a team of WE instead of a team of ME. That was a huge difference between last year's team and this year. This attitude could be witnessed from the stands. There was an attitude shift toward the end for the better.

Sometimes it isn't about all of the talent on the team, but how they use that talent as a cohesive unit. Yes some of that responsibility is on the coach, but the other part of the responsibility is on each individual player.

2.Maybe the coach did change her style or maybe she didn't. Do we know this for sure? What we could see is that the girls started playing as a team and that clearly made the difference.

3.I don't think it was luck they went to CCS. It is how the coach manages the season and the tournaments that she places her team in which qualified them for CCS (I believe before the season started). They happened to win the right games or be in the right tournaments. As for your comment on "I am just as competitive as you," how can you comment on my competitiveness when you don't even know who I am, my experience, or my character?

4.If you have been in the ring of fire, maybe you should step up and offer your services to the school. It sounds like you would be an awesome coach if you have the experience you stated. Do you think everyone would be happy with you as a coach? Also, do you think parent's would still coach from the stands with you as a coach? From my experience, some parents always try to undermine a high school coach (unless they are in private school).

5.What I was saying is if it is truly abuse, you walk away and you sacrifice the game. Basketball or any sport is not a requirement of high school graduation. I am not saying it is right to have to walk away from high school basketball, but children should be in a safe environment. If the sport is not safe for your child walk away and find a recreation league. Teaching a child to stay in an abusive situation, in my opinion, is not a life lesson that should be taught to children or young adults.

And I am not telling anyone to lie or use a different address to play at a different school. Why do you know someone that is out of the district playing? If you do know someone out of the district, it is your responsibility to report the discrepancy to CIF / CSS and the schools involved. It takes opportunities and funding away from children that are rightfully in the correct location. It is against CIF rules for people to play out of their respective districts without permission.

6.If you win, that is good for your cause and more power to you. But realistically there are worse out there. Don't create romanticism on the subject. I have known people in the same situation where they fought to get a coach out, succeeded and ended up with someone 10 times worse.

Would it be better for MV to have a coach like the guy from Wilcox? Is that type of coach better than the current coach? I am just curious of your opinion.

7.Wishing a program good luck does not make me a good person. Being a good person makes me a good person.

Just because I can see a POV different from yours doesn't make me an enemy. I see what I personally observe and what the news article says. No more and no less. It is unfortunate that it comes across that you assume you know who I am and my character just by how I present what I see as facts.

I see all of the conflict with people's opinion on what the coach does. Has anyone even spoken to the coach about it? Good, bad or otherwise a coach deserves that much.

If there is truly an issue with this coach, why worry about repercussions? You want to report issues so there is a record of incidents. That protects your children!

But is this really about protecting your children or winning the battle of "we hate the coach and want her gone"?!?

"There is one choice in life we face over and over again -- the hard right or the easy wrong."


Posted by toscaredtospeak, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Feb 27, 2011 at 8:17 am

Stopthemonkeybusiness.

I have to say.What a difference between your 1st and 2nd posts. I think The Situation helped you do a lot of growing in a very short time. I would thank whoever it is.


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Cuesta Park
on Feb 27, 2011 at 10:33 am

lol. oh pulease. no one on this board had anything to do with it.

There is so much hate mongering here it is disgusting. That is what an emotionally charged issue can do to insiders. You can't even see the hard facts presented to the media.

A lot of the handles who post here are trying to bully others that have opposing views. Those folks need to grow up. Just because you state a coach is a bully doesn't make it so. But you are showing everyone how much you are trying to bully others here. Do you think that helps your cause? And if you are parents, that is being taught to your children. That isn't going to jive in the real world when they have a boss and a paycheck.

If you wanted to everyone agree with you, maybe your bandwagon should have selected a different venue to air the issue.

Good luck with your smear campaign. Karma Happens!


Posted by mark, a resident of Sylvan Park
on Feb 27, 2011 at 10:59 am

i think to(o)scaredtospeak lost all credibility in my book after reader proved her wrong with her arguments....seriously a stubborn one sided overprotective mother


Posted by Meka, a resident of Sylvan Park
on Feb 28, 2011 at 7:45 pm

As a parent of a student that has been playing for the JV team and will play for varsity next year. My daughter and I both love Judy. When those parents decided to try to have her fired they did not think about the impact it would have on both the JV and Varsity teams. I am hear to say that they do not speak for all the parents or players. They are speaking for themselves. Why would they wait until the child's senior year to start all this drama. Did they not think about the team and the stress it would put on all the girls when they decided to go to extreme measures. I have heard girls on both teams say that this is making their season horrible. Other students in their school are asking them why do they want to fire their own coach and what was wrong with them. This mess has even brought the spotlight on some of the quiet players who just want to play ball and not have attention focused on them. Judy is a wonderful coach. While those parents are complaining they did not have any complaints when Judy used her own money to purchase items for the team or the times when she treated the girls to lunch or aftergame yogurt trips.


Posted by Trevea, a resident of Monta Loma
on Mar 1, 2011 at 1:02 am

If the kid can't stand the heat, she should get out of the kitchen. She Chose to play on the team, she can just as easily quit the team.


Posted by Nancy Polisso, a resident of Shoreline West
on Mar 1, 2011 at 8:25 am

Mountain View parents. No more hiding behind fake names. This needs to be taken care of amongst ourselves. This is an issue between the Coaches and the families on the Varsity team. All of these people, including this family and coach, mean alot to everyone, especially THE CHILD. Please stop posting on this thread and feel free to call me if you would like to know my opinion. I'm on the e-mail list.

Nancy Polisso
(Bailey's mom)


Posted by Amy Miller, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 1, 2011 at 11:40 am

I am not a parent. I am close to a few of the families with children in the program. It seems to me that if this coach was so awful, she would have been reported a long time ago. I think right now there are bigger issues with the team such as cheating. Yes, cheating!

Teaching team sports should teach sportsmanship, teamwork, discipline and a few other life lessons, such as how to deal with disappointment when a team loses. All of these are character building to life. Cheating, lying and name calling should not be part of the lessons they are learning. When parents lie, and put their children in a district that they do not belong in, it teaches their children that lying and cheating is acceptable. I think this team has a lot more to worry about like teaching children right from wrong, doing the right thing, and working through adversity than name calling and trying to get rid of someone that they do not agree with.


Posted by Meka, a resident of Sylvan Park
on Mar 1, 2011 at 4:10 pm

Since someone believes I am hiding I am Shameka(Taylor's mom) and this issue is just not a varsity thing. It is a issue for everyone involved with girls b-ball at MVHS!! Since my child is now on Varsity I can and will speak on this issue. This would have stayed between the coach, the team and the families if certain people would not have made it public news with their very public protest. How did the paper find out about this issue? It was not from the coach, players or the school staff. This should have stayed between the parties involved and the school adminastration. If the school is leaning towards firing Judy I wish they would take the time to talk to all Varsity and upcoming Varsity players about their own personal encounters they have had with the Coach. There are 23 girls total on the two teams so therefore 1 or 2 or maybe even 3 families can not speak and take actions that will affect everyone in the name of so called looking out for upcoming players. They are not looking out for my child!! I AM!!! I SAY JUDY IS THE BEST FOR MY CHILD!!!


Posted by anonymous, a resident of Blossom Valley
on Mar 1, 2011 at 7:27 pm

"Sports do not build character. They reveal it." John Wooden


Posted by annoyedplayer2, a resident of Cuernavaca
on Mar 2, 2011 at 12:45 am

i agree completely with the original annoyed player. this whole scandal has embarrassed the whole basketball team( both JV&Varsity girls) kids constantly come up to us at school saying, "wow! i heard about what's going on between Sharissa and your coach, why do you guys hate her so much" and it's making the rest of us look extremely bad. when a majority of us really just want to stay out of it. Sharissa constantly harrasses her fellow teammates to "please email or write a letter to mr.moody" even when its obvious that they want absolutely NOTHING to do it. dont get me wrong, i love Sharissa and she is a great offensive player..and she's a fun person to be around. but i honestly don't think she should've taken this situation so far. i mean gosh, she's a senior.! she doesnt have to deal with Judy anymore. so build a bridge and get over it...


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 2, 2011 at 11:57 pm

I wonder what would have happened if Taylor was called a witch...any parent that wouldn't stick up for their child if they thought they were being mistreated is not a parent.

Love,
TheSituation


Posted by A Spectator, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 3, 2011 at 1:20 am

The moral of this story is don't drag people into drama that don't want to be involved or don't think there is an issue.

Not everyone has the same experiences. @ least 1 player had an issue w/the coach. So that player & player's family have a right to deal w/the issue. It isn't really right for them to drag an entire school into the mix. Peer pressure is a sort of bullying. So if the coach is an alleged bully, now the girl that was allegelly bullied is pressuring others to write against their coach when they might not have a problem or issue, that is bullying in a way too. This is just totally crazy!

Parents take responsibility for your own children. Period.

If other players and families have an issue, that is their seperate issue.

As for THE SITUATION. Why place other children in the scenario? Maybe something happened in the scenario that people don't know. You can't just say 'what if' because you can create scenarios all day long. High schoolers are not all perfect angels. Some push the envelop. Not saying the coach calling a player names is cool, but you have to look at the entire scenario. But being disrespectful to a coach isn't cool either. The truth is the middle of both sides of the story.


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 3, 2011 at 10:36 am

I never said anything about teenagers being "perfect angels" so Im not sure where that came from.

What is wrong with seeing another point of view. That is part of having an adult discussion. If you can't put yourself in another persons shoes how are you supposed to understand what is going on in their heads?


Posted by Nancy Polisso, a resident of North Whisman
on Mar 3, 2011 at 11:22 am

Hey. Has everyone heard how great the Boys and Girls soccer tams are doing at Mountain View!!!! Both made it to the CCS Finals!!!! GO SPARTANS!!!!


Posted by Graduate of 2008, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 6, 2011 at 11:22 pm

I played ball at MVHS for all 4 years of my high school career and I loved it. Most of all I loved being on varsity because of Coach Judy. I've learned so much from her. I don't understand why a 4 year varsity player would say stuff like that to a respected coach. And what bugs me the most is this quote from the paper: "I believe there has never been a player of this caliber at this school." To be honest I find that an insult towards me. I was athlete of the year my senior year, got MVP all 4 years of my basketball career(even on JV) and received 1st team all league De Anza Division. I don't mean to brag at all but Sharissa was on Varsity from freshman year when I played as a senior. I was extremely good friends with her and I knew as a captain that she would talk to be about any problems, but she didn't. I knew that she wasn't happy because she didn't play much because she was a freshman on varsity with 8 seniors.
To end this comment, I love Judy so much that I know she doesn't deserve any of this silly sh*t thats going on. It's very childish and disrespectful. No coach or person deserves this type of abuse.
Thanks


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 3:20 pm

Wow! I know this is hard to read but on Max Preps stats for her freshmen year they have her as the 3rd leading scorer on the team. For not getting to play alot behind 8 seniors, I gotta say pretty impressive.




Athlete Name PPG Pts FGM FGA 2FGM 2FGA 3FGM 3FGA FTM FTA
Season Totals 45.8 1283 483 441 42 275
Graph Data [+] [+] [+] [+] [+] [+]
10 K. Taguma .8 21 5 4 1 10
11 K. Leong 1.1 28 14 14
12 E. Eline 2.0 51 20 11 9 2
13 A. Alcaraz 3.2 86 34 34 18
14 L. Wada 1.6 46 19 16 3 5
20 M. Ivanic 3.7 104 41 39 2 20
21 M. Sawamura 1.2 33 10 9 1 12
23 S. Estremera 7.7 216 79 56 23 35
25 I. Dukanovic .8 21 7 7 7
32 A. Watanabe 1.5 12 3 1 2 4
35 A. Greenberg 11.0 309 118 118 73
42 N. Warmbrodt 9.9 278 100 99 1 77
45 L. Sutton .6 18 8 8 2
55 S. Hess 2.5 60 25 25 10


Posted by '08, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 6:42 pm

Im pretty sure it was because she hit 3's most of the time. It's not hard to read at all. I just know what happened to Judy is extremely unethical. But yes Sharissa is a great ball player but honestly I find that comment from the paper about Sharissa being the best player Mountain View has ever seen an insult. Thats all.


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 10:06 pm

I'm sorry but LOL!


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 10:14 pm

I'm sorry but im not over it yet!!! LOL


Posted by No Worries., a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 10:21 pm

Now "TheSituation" is making me laugh! i agree with '08. Not sure who it is but it seems as though that person is right. I've seen Sharissa play her freshman year and I'd have to say, Greenberg and Warmbrodt were the teams best players. If you look on line it'll show stats and 1st team all leagues and both of them had gotten all leagues. Warmbrodt with 1st and Greenberg with 2nd. But again, what '08 is saying is that Judy doesn't need all this drama. It's not right how her father is handling all of this. Not very good judgment or influence for his daughter.


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 10:27 pm

What exactly was unethical here? If I am not mistaken...the adult called the player a B****...oops..i mean witch....or was it itch? We can talk about ethics all day...and who ever said those two players weren't the best ones out there? It wasnt me...


Posted by No Worries., a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 10:41 pm

Hmm, good question. But how do you really know if she called her Bit**? honestly, were you there? I heard that Sharissa's dad had been trying to fire Judy ever since her freshman year. For such a silly reason: THAT SHE DIDN'T PLAY ENOUGH! Very funny to me. See what a little white lie can do to a coach and to a family?


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 7, 2011 at 10:53 pm

If you had any knowledge of the situation at all...other then what Judy told you...you would know that this was all started when Judy sent an inappropriate email to the team during Sharrisas sophomore year...and Judy is the one that told me about that...and yes, as a matter of fact, I was sitting right there, in the hallway. Maybe I can't read, but it looks to me like she admitted to calling a player a witch...I mean B****....oops...or was it itch? You are seriously trying to convince me she actually witch? It has never been about playing time...she plays all the time...LOL...but I dont know why she plays...she only hits threes...right '08?


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 8, 2011 at 11:19 pm

Why don't we give credit where credit is due to the Best Women's Basketball player to EVER come out of Mountain View High School.... Michelle Bento (now Michelle Bento-Jackson). She was a star basketball stand out in the Valley. Written up in the Mercury News and was actually RECRUITED. Thriving in two sports (softball and basketball) in college and then to move into the coaching sector as a DIV 1 coach later in her career. That is one ROCK STAR of an athlete.

That is FACT. Do your research peeps.


Posted by yourcool, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 9, 2011 at 12:05 am

Judy had said noting to me. and for your information, i got that email too and i saw it as a joke. but honestly you think that the cops are going to say that shirtless guys are porn? LMFAO! You might as well write letters to all the magazines and tell them that all the pictures of the shirtless people are porn.

At Stop The Monkey Business: i agree, i think that TheSituation should definitely do research. i had actually just looked up Michelle Bento a week ago and was very amazed by her.


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 9, 2011 at 7:58 am

No one has ever said that Sharissa was the best player in MVHS history! Im sure there were some great players. Read the article! I happen to also know Michelle very well...lol...you guys are really reachin here. Stay on topic. Michelle has nothing to do with this at all.

As for the email. It is not up to you to decide what is ok in Sharissas house. A High School Basketball coaches emails should be about BASKETBALL. Thats all. Just because you think you might be close enough for her to send that, its not the same for every player. And when all that happened, and Sharissas parents brought it up, all Judy had to do was apologize to the family for using poor judgement.

Stop bringing up pointless subjects...respond to the last post.


Posted by Observer, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 9, 2011 at 8:13 am

At one point does this discussion get shut down? There are minors being identified in these comments and the paper has no business allowing this type of rumor-mongering to continue. If this were solely about the adults running our schools and cities the paper would have locked it down by now. Shame on the editor.


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 9, 2011 at 1:36 pm

"I believe there has never been a player of this caliber at this school" What does this quote mean, The Situation? This quote IS in the article and could be construed as meaning being the best in MVHS history. I was staying on topic and I was just giving props to the best known elite player in the school's history, and that is where Michelle Bento has something to do with this.

The Situation, this is directly to you, since I am going to assume you are with the team somehow and seem to be in support of the player in this article.

1)From an earlier post. You have experience coaching, "Paragraph 4: I have been in the ring of fire…from league championships all the way to state titles. I know a good coach when I see one."
2) You have connections, personally knowing Michelle Bento Jackson.

Why not help the kid get recruited if she is that rockin' a BBall player?

If we want to talk about going off topic, this article is just about the coach, one player and one family issues. So really if we wanted to stay on topic, the comments on this board would only be pertaining to those issues. You are okay with going off topic, but no okay with others going off topic? Get a grip; you aren't king or queen of all comments.


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 9, 2011 at 4:02 pm

Haha that was her dad! He has a right to think that she is the best doesnt he? It's not like Michelle Bento, a great player and coach, was saying that. What is with the recruiting thing? Out of the whole article, thats all you picked up? Guess what...I dont even think she is that good...but that doesnt matter....because we are talking about the coach right? Here are a few reasons she should be fired...
--Lost 9 games
--Called a player a B****
--Then lied and said she said Witch
--No common sense(if there is one family that doesnt like you...why do you pick on their kid? Why not cut her after her sophomore year? Ooo...cuz you wanted to win!)
--Did I already mention she lost 9 games?

Love,
TheSituation


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Monta Loma
on Mar 9, 2011 at 7:00 pm

The Situation

You're right they lost 9 games. But they won last year. I know they had the same base team as last year but it could have been a dynamics change with the newbies that came up.

With the comment between Witch and B*****, honestly only two that know what happened were the ones in the room. Even if something was overheard it can be taken out of context. Unless you were in the room all is hearsay. And unless you know someone's personality, the b-word might not even be in someone's vocab. Some people can't even bring themselves to say it in context of dogs.

Lying isn't cool for a majority of things, but humans do it.

Common Sense...well is it really common anymore?

I agree with you, if there was a prob with the player the coach should have cut her. I like giving peeps the benefit of the doubt. Could it have been a political thing? Since there was a little issue (the email), it could have been taken as retaliation had player been cut afterward. I don't know the mind set of said coach, but that would have gone through my mind.

And again yes they lost 9 games. But a lot of teams have losing seasons and don't get rid of their coaches (unless we are talking private schools).

It just seems a lot of former student athletes on here and some who have some connection with the coach now, love the coach. Are they all wrong? Or is it a difference of opinion for what works best for different peeps?

Are we pre-occuppied with winning or something else? There are lessons to me learned from losing games. It sucks but at the end of the game someone has to or we wouldn't keep score.




Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 9, 2011 at 7:46 pm

It seems to me like all the players that are saying anything are players from passed seasons or JV players from this season...which is odd to me because this article is about something that happened this season on the varsity team. I bet I could go back and find 50 people that hate me and 50 people that love me. Who do you think I would contact to stick up for me? If you were present for the games you would have seen the "newbies" doing nothing but contribute positively to the games. One starter graduated last year...if you cannot figure out how to win more then 3 games in league with basically the same team you should call it quits. You are essentially telling me that we won 9 games because of one player last year...and I do not believe that. Im not sure what you are talking about when you compare public and private school coaches.

Does your comment about lying make lying okay? Just curious...

You obviously dont have enough info about the conversation in the locker room because I know that there were two other coaches that were in the same room.

Your common sense comment just shows me that you realize that it was common sense to not pick on this kid...you just wont admit it.

I know that the administration told Judy that they would support her if she decided to cut the child after the email incident...but she decided to keep her.

I have witnessed the disrespect shown to this child, both to her face and behind her back, for two years...by multiple coaches, not just Judy. I have also seen players leave the gym crying several times after practices for things that were said to them.

She attacked this kid just like she felt she was attacked by the family. Unfortunately, her decision effected many players and families in this progam. She needs to be held acountable and removed.


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 9, 2011 at 7:47 pm

Sincerely,

TheSituation


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 10, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Well the article is about what happened to Sharissa this season and whenever the infamous email was sent. It really has nothing to do with the team as a whole.

This forum seems to be muck rucking about other things that have nothing to do with this article. It doesn't help other causes.

I was at some games this season as well as past seasons, and I didn't see the newbies all that supportive to be honest with you. But I guess that is all in a POV. You see what you want to see. I am a neutral party to everything and have no stake whatsoever in any outcome. I am not a player, parent,or alum (and what does this have to do with me, you are probably wondering....it was in the paper and I am a fan. This article made it everyone's business).

I am essentially telling you that the team lost, I believe, 8 players. I never said MV lost because of one player. You said that, not me. I am saying the dynamic of the newbies brought up could change the attitude and dynamic, which is what I bet happened. That would be 8 players that changed the dynamic, not one. The players on the sideline are just as important to the success of a team as a team's active players. They can bring up an attitude or bring it down. That energy from the sidelines wasn't there this season.

Lying isn't ok in most situations. If it was life and death, heck yeah it is okay! But maybe other peeps out there have a different opinion on that. That is everyone's right.

I meant what I said about common sense. It doesn't tell you anything else. I said what I meant. It isn't common anymore. Period.

Common sense tells me not to bad mouth a coach in the public media where it could be turned around and used in a libel case. But that doesn't stop some people. It might not be in their common sense repertoire. But it is in mine.

If you don't like the coach, that is cool. But you really better make sure everything said on here is FACT and something that can be proved. Libel is a very serious thing.

The article, which we all seem to have gotten away from, was about 1 player, their family and 1 coach. If there is a bigger issue, then go settle it in the appropriate venue. The coach needs to stop being attacked in public on other issues that may or may not be true or may or may not be able to be proven. Freedom of speech is one thing. Character assassination is something else. That isn't cool or legal.

And for the record, I am not defending the coach. I don't know what happens behind closed doors or insider meetings. Heck I don't even have insider connections. I am just against people bad mouthing a coach without proper due process and evidence. If there is a problem, go through the proper channels. This really isn't it.

Thanks for the dialog. It's been swell.





Posted by who cares?, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 10, 2011 at 8:48 pm

To StopThe MonkeyBusiness,

YOU ARE AWESOME!! AND SO CORRECT!

-'08


Posted by Nancy Polisso, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 10, 2011 at 10:11 pm

To stopthemonkeybusiness....pick a neighborhood..you seem to move around quite a bit.

To who cares... or 08...why do you care????

To The Situation....thanks for your take on things as a mature adult, you have expressed yourself elequently.

Stop the Monkey Business, your right, The coach, family, and child should not be attacked publicly...your right.

This will play out the way it should. I know I have done what is right and hopefully the school will take it from here.

Nancy Polisso

I think we have covered it all.

Nancy Polisso


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 10, 2011 at 10:41 pm

Paragraph 1: You're right….it is about a child and how she was mistreated by an adult. How can anyone argue that?

Paragraph 2: Then stop bring up Michelle Bento…the MV STAR….hehe

Paragraph 3: Nor am I a player, parent, or alum…and I wasn't wondering, you don't have to defend yourself…I'm not attacking you

Paragraph 4: I'll copy/paste my argument again…here it is…One starter graduated last year...if you cannot figure out how to win more then 3 games in league with basically the same team you should call it quits. You are essentially telling me that we won 9 games because of one player last year...and I do not believe that….your response makes no sense.

Paragraph 5: I don't lie. Lying is never ok with me.

Paragraph 6, 7: Umm…huh? Was there a point in there somewhere?

Paragraph 8, 9: What exactly do you think I am lying about? Is that a threat?

Paragraph 10: You are obviously willing to go to battle for her…and no one else. If you aren't on her side then please put your feet in the families shoes for just a second…you can't be neutral ant not stick up for both sides.


Posted by StopThe MonkeyBusiness, a resident of Shoreline West
on Mar 12, 2011 at 10:50 pm

I can move around the MV neighborhoods. I heart all of MV. I must represent!

To THE SITUATION

If you have to twist my points around to get a meaning that is not there, it isn't worth addressing anymore.

I'm very happy for you that under zero circumstances, you will not lie. That is your code and glad you know your limits. I would lie to keep any child safe and also if I was in a hostage situation, and am happy to be honest and knowledgeable about my limits.

I never stated anyone was lying. Wow, another misinterpretation of my words. I said that you better make sure that you can prove what you are saying. Character assassination in print (which is also online forums) is libel. Character assassination in speech is slander. That is insight from a basic business law class. And no, that wasn't a threat. I was stating the fact about what libel is. How was I threatening, by giving you some insight? lol

I have known peeps in similar situations. So I can see the POV of the parentals. There is a right and wrong way to get things done in the school setting. Public schools are particularly tricky. And if you are paying attention, a lot of the argument points I and others have made on here, would help your cause. But you are too busy arguing and seeing something one sided, to see it right in front of you. Not my problem. I am not going to put up the know how in flamboyant neon lights. You aren't ready for the lesson grasshopper.

But this is what I see from THE SITUATION, whoever you are. You attack the coach and the people that have a different opinion than yours. That is your right. But there are many flavors of opinion out there. I could argue either way as I appreciate things from many different POVs.

My MAIN POINT: Let this be played out in the right places with the right people. Trying to bully the opposition in an online forum isn't going to get it done.

If I wanted to defend the coach, I would have given better defense than I have. The point was to give compelling argument from a different POV. It was getting a little droll with one-sidedness on this forum page. We needed to liven it up with a little variety. It was also to give people a welcoming place to be able to harbor a difference of opinion (personally I love to argue, so this has been AWESOME!). It was also to facilitate giving a voice to ones that don't feel like they have a voice (students). From the sounds of this article and the response, some student athletes have been embarrassed and placed in an awkward situation by these public events. Does anyone care about them??? Giving them a voice, allows them to take some of their power back. Now to address possible other student-athletes with issues, again I state this, deal with it in the appropriate manner.

I give kudos to the students who weren't afraid to voice their opinion on here. I give you all a circle of applause. Who cares if they are on JV or Varsity? It really shouldn't be qualified or quantified. They all deal with the coach. But whatever view of the coach the student-athletes have (both JV and varsity), they ALL need to be brave and share it with the decision makers, the principals.

Keep the coach or fire the coach. In the big scheme of 80-100 year life span, this will be just another life lesson for the student-athlete.

Peace out.



Posted by Nancy Polisso, a resident of North Whisman
on Mar 15, 2011 at 9:35 pm

Honestly...just at a loss for words. Stopthemonkeybusiness,I so hope you are not a parent on this team like you have stated. I see that you view The Situation as a "bully" but I see it as obviously a different side and with a voice just like yours. I have been very close to this situation and all I want to see is a High School basketball arena to be just that. No stress and a place for these kids to escape the pressures of life and have some fun. I have a Div 1 college player and I know what the stresses can bring. High School needs to be FUN!!!!! This is where it ends for most of these kids. High School does not need to be where they learn about bosses and pay checks and when things will or will not "Jive"....there is so much life more to come for these kids. Thanks for the parenting advise....but I pass!!! Again, High School is the last time we can be "parents" and we can help them through difficult times. You do it your way....I'll do it mine. Good Luck to you and yours and I truly pray we all come out for the better.

Nancy Polisso


Posted by TheSituation, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 15, 2011 at 10:21 pm

Like a mature adult I tried to put myself in your shoes StopThe MonkeyBusiness. I tried so hard to think of something witty, inteligent, or morally correct to say back to Mrs. Polisso...but its absolutely impossible. And the best part of it all was that she was nice! HAHAHA

WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!!!!! How's that jive with ya?

With little to no respect,

TheSituation


Posted by thecloser, a resident of Old Mountain View
on Mar 15, 2011 at 10:37 pm

This whole thing needs to stop now. All of you sticking up for this coach needs to come to the realization that what she did was wrong. From what she has put this young girl through for 4 years,all the way up to the verbal abuse this year. (how many others has she done this to that we dont know about,scary isnt it)Just pretend that this young girl was yours!!!!! Would you be saying the same things you are saying or would you be concerned. Now on the other end of this she is not a good coach. Lets just find out if she knows how to call a time out. I rest my case simply on that point.


Posted by 3rd time is not a charm, a resident of another community
on May 2, 2011 at 4:12 pm

This sort of thisng has happened before with this same coach with 2 other schools she has coached at. Just wondering how these Athletic Directors who are in charge of hiring her aren't looking at refferences and past experience. It frightens me that she is still coaching.


Posted by Nancy Polisso, a resident of Old Mountain View
on May 18, 2011 at 8:30 pm

Be specific. What do you know about Coach Auclair's previous jobs.


Posted by Denice/Mukwonago WI, a resident of another community
on Jun 24, 2011 at 9:06 am

Wow, I read it all and "the closer" and others have said it best when they ask why is this coach still coaching? The coach is abusive and has no control and needs to go. I'm sure the player has lost all respect for this coach and is fed up with her and possibly why she is considered as being "disrespectful", but like someone else said "respects goes both ways". We are teaching our girls to stick up for themselves today so not to be a "doormat" like my generation was taught. Players still need to be respectful, but I'm sure all of this came to a boiling point and sounds like both coach and player lost control. I now ask, "Who is the adult here?" Sounds like the AD and administration has been at this school too long and that's how they used to coach and so that's why they continue to let this happen. Times have changed. The "old school" way of coaching is out. The days of yelling and screaming and no water at practice and run till you puck days are over. A person can be demeaned and degraded for so long and then they fight back. Well, this player is fighting back because she is being taught to be a strong young woman.

Our high school is going through the same thing and yes it involves my daughter who also is going to be a Senior this next year. Our new coach came in off an asst. coach being let go because after many years of complaining of "inappropriate behavior" with the girls, he finally sexually molested one of our varsity players. My daughter was in 8th grade at the time, but he was also coaching our 8th grade girls team too! This man always creeped me out. Call it a VERY sensitive 6th sense since I too was sexually molested by a coach when I was in HS. I told my daughter to be careful of him and then this incident happened. Now our current coach is female, but she is insidious and a bully! After my daughter's junior year, us parents finally found out what she had said and done to them! Our mouths just dropped when one day 4 out the 6 to be seniors all shared their personal stories with us parents. Our girls didn't whine and cry all season. Yes, there were some things they complained about, but us parents don't like to question too much what your kid is complainging about because we know that there is always two sides to a story. My husband and I also coach in the community and I have coached on the JV/Varsity level before I had children. I never swear at my players to motivate them. And yes, on the recreation level it does get frustrating, but it is my job to develop their skills in order to make in on the next level in middle/high school or club/select. How could I possibly encourage and build one's confidence by demeaning a child and calling them a "f-ing loser" or "f-quitter" or "you play like a bunch of f-ing idiots" or pulling players out of class to talk basketball or make playes eat lunch with you in the coach's office and if you don't show up then you are the one that is gossiped about or asked our captains and other students, who are friends, of the players to "get dirt" on the players to see who is drinking, doing drugs, or smoking! Our coach also has her captains critique the players and tell them what they did wrong in the game. She also tries to pit one girl against another instead of building teamwork by making girls text certain questions to other players asking them why they want to quit or having the undersclassmen lecture the junior players about how it is ok for the coach to yell at them....that the coach is just trying to motivate them and if they don't go out for the team next season then they are losers and quitters because they left them behind! I could go on and on. This isn't a one time incident of a coach calling one player a "bitch" or "witch". This is a lot more serious than that and whose to day this didn't happen in Mountain View Case.

My daughter is also being recruited by many colleges and not due to her high school team. It's due to her AAU team who has built up her skills and confidence only to be torn away by her current coach! A few colleges have also come to see her play in HS games and the coach didn't play my daughter or talk to the coach. College coaches have talked with the HS coach via telephone after watching my daughter play in AAU games, and then we never hear back from the coach! Our coach also sent a less than stellar email that she so proudly forwarded to us thinking it WAS a positive email! This email stated that yes our daughter was "tall and athletic, but fails to finish at the hoop". We finally told the school that the coach is not allowed to correspond with any more colleges concerning our daughter and that if the coach receives anymore mail from coaches for our daughter, she is to give them to her school counselor as we don't trust the AD either! It's a small town with what I call "small town incest". Everyone knows everyone. Everyone is related to everyone in our school system and our daughters and students in our school system are NOT being educated or coached in a safe environment.

We have 19 girls that have come forward from the past three seasons that have stated they also have been victim to her abuse. How many more do we need to get the administration to realize there is something wrong? All of us families also have younger children coming up in the system and we want this to stop before they get to the HS. Even our youth basketball board has seen how manipulative our coach can be when she tries to "overthrow" the board in order to get all fundraiser money to supplement her coaching staff, which by the way is bigger than a D1 football organization and two of her coaches are siblings!

Shall I go on? Should we just suck it up and learn from it and move on as well or do you think we are justified to fight this? It may be too late for our Seniors, but not too late for the rest of the program. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know.

Our administration should be ashamed of themselves.


Posted by rs230, a resident of another community
on Jul 7, 2011 at 7:37 pm

rs230 is a registered user.

Our two daughters were bullied by their High School Dance Team coach. The worst of the bullying occurred after the Principal forwarded our emails of concern onto the coach. The coach retaliated against us by bullying our daughters. Our oldest daughter was a Special Needs student and was bullied the worst.

We took our concerns to the Superintendent and even the Town Board of Education, but we were not taken seriously. Our complaints and concerns went unanswered as we were told the matter was a "personnel" matter and therefore could not be discussed. The bullying got worse when we hired an attorney. Having legal representation only made the school become more agitated and annoyed with us.

Only through Freedom of Information Act requests and obtaining correspondences, including emails, of all school personnel involved did we discover the conspiracy and willful effort to deny our claims. A quote from one email written by the Superintendent to the Principal states, "If we continue to refute all allegations then we will shatter the accusations that come in from those parties who are trying to make things such a big deal. Hang in there…" We attempted to speak before the Town Board of Education and were denied to speak freely. A letter written to us by the Superintendent states, "If in the future if you plan to speak at another board meeting during public participation, please refrain from any accusations or allegations against personnel. It is against the board's policy." The efforts by the Town, the School and its employees involved to dismiss our claims were very strong, at times we felt powerless but it only made us stronger in other ways. Our attorney was most surprised by the schools lack of concern and unwillingness to resolve the situation.

We have presented our case to the State Board Of Education Special Education Division over nine day's of Hearings. The facts determined by the Hearing Officer was that there were "outrageous acts of bullying" by the coach and that the Board "failed to appropriately reprimand" the coach, "and in fact, the Board acquiesced in the bullying by demoting the Student and supporting the advisor's outrageous behavior".

The Hearing Officer found that my oldest daughters Civil Rights were violated under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act. The school has sought to appeal this decision and we are currently awaiting trial in Federal Court. The local News channel recently covered the story and can be seen on youtube.com at, Web Link

For all those parents that find it too difficult to fight city hall, don't give up for what you believe in. In the end, justice will prevail and the findings will benefit all of us by forcing schools to be responsible and accountable for their actions, or in our situation, lack of actions.


Posted by Concerned Parent, a resident of another community
on Jan 22, 2012 at 12:55 pm

Your coach is no where near as bad as ours. My daughters coach curses at the girls, throws clipboards shattering then and pieces hit 2 girls in the face. He has told the team to "Get those little F*****", tells them they are selfish and says none of you care all you care about is the future. Hello! Yesterday is gone, today will be gone soon and the future is the rest of your life. Get a clue. In regards to recruiting it is the parent responsiblity to help get there child recruited. My daughterr will be attending a college back east in the fall. If you want results contact NCSA recruiting sit. My daughter had so many choices and it's all how you address them. Unfortunately the school doesn't have any laws for bullying of coaches trust me I've checked and our coach not only puts our childrens mental state at jeopady but also there physical.


Posted by reynoir, a resident of another community
on Dec 30, 2013 at 7:15 am

This is terrible. This young lady should respect her Coach and teammates. Her family should support the coach and the program. I played high school basketball, won state three years in a row with a record of 109-8. She would have been releases from the team as a freshman and would have played jv her entire career under Coach Bert Jenkins of Gulfport Ms. [Portion removed due to disrespectful comment or personal attack] I hope that they remember when her career at the high school is over what will her revisits be like at games and in the community. My sophomore daughter and her team from Camarillo is playing in a tournament in this area this weekend.Talking back is one thing. If we got a technical we were sent to the dressing room. i got one and the next night had one of my best games of my high school career with 26 points. i will call and ask my daughter if she got to see this team play or play against them.


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